The Craziest Language

How fun it is, observing the grandkids as they start communicating. Gestures begin to make sense and random sounds become intelligible words. It's amazing how quickly these little ones can make themselves understood!
I hope they'll have the opportunity and blessing of learning more than one language some day. One thing I know for sure: any second language they learn will be much easier than their mother tongue, which happens to be English. Consider the following poem, which my son (a first grade bi-lingual teacher) recently emailed me.

The Craziest Language

We'll begin with a box and the plural is boxes;

But the plural of ox should be oxen not oxes.

Then one fowl is a goose, but two are called geese;

Yet the plural moose should never be meese.

You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice;

Yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.

If the plural of man is always called men,

Why shouldn’t the plural of pan be called pen?

If I speak of my foot and show you my feet,

And I give you boot, would a pair be called beet?

If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,

Why shouldn’t the plural of booth be called beeth?

Then one may be that, and three would be those,

Yet hat in the plural would never be hose.

And the plural of cat is cats, not cose.

We speak of a brother and also of brethren,

But though we say mother, we never say methren.

Then the masculine pronouns are he, his, and him,

But imagine the feminine: she, shis, and shim.

So English, I fancy, you will agree,

Is the craziest language you ever did see.

Author - Unknown